“Rescue me
Oh take me in your arms
Rescue me
I want your tender charms
‘Coz I’m lonely and I’m blue
I need you and your love too
Come on and rescue me.”
— “Rescue Me” by Aretha Franklin
What experiences of your life contribute to who you are?
One of my favorite questions to ask candidates whom I am interviewing is: “What formative experiences of your life have contributed to you becoming the person you are today?” I understand this is a big question and requires some reflection and self-awareness, which is one of the many reasons that I like to ask this question. I value the pursuit of self-awareness; it has been a journey I have been on for most of my adult life. I have learned from the field of emotional intelligence that self-awareness is essential to having self-control. Personally, I want to work towards having both so that I can live the most authentic life possible.
The framework of emotional intelligence — and the twelve competencies of this important mixture of interpersonal abilities — has also illustrated that to be good in relationships one must first be good with themselves. Self-awareness is the road to understanding others and being in healthy relationships. That, too, is a chosen destination of mine.
This simple but big question about life experiences being the learning edge of one’s development has been my personal path and the professional orientation in my career. For me, to learn and understand myself, my strengths, my flat-sides, and treasures — and to have experiences that stretch me — keeps me growing and contributing. To be in the stage of self-discovery is when I feel most alive.
I have also engaged in this reflective activity to understand the generational patterns that I carry, which may cause me pain. The most challenging moments of my life have been when I held too tightly to a pattern that no longer served me but was deeply learned and hard to release.
Both my joyful- and very difficult life-experiences have been formative, and contribute to who I am today.
Again, I present a lengthy preamble to what I want to share.
In 2013, I had an experience that contributed to my life as an adult.
While helping look for a friend’s run-away dog, I found a starving, large dog on an industrial site. Without hesitation, I committed to return every day with my Brindle Boxer best friend Buddha Bear to feed this large-breed, feral dog until he trusted us enough to bring him safely home.
Little did we know that this would become a commitment of two months. What we envisioned as a rescue and rehome of an abandoned dog became a commitment to provide him a better life.
His name was Big Boy and he was a South African mastiff with a big heart and a dark story of an earlier life. Meeting him changed our lives, forever.
To earn his trust, I found my best and most patient self. I also found a strong and loyal self who was willing to sacrifice for another. The months of quiet, relationship building helped Big Boy; but the process also helped me to slow down and find my grounding.
I have told this story to many and committed to writing it as a book. In the process, many people encouraged me to write it as a children’s book. And so, I have.
My formative experience of rescuing Big Boy is now my first children’s book entitled, “Lost, Found & Forever: When you make a promise keep it.”
There is so much more to this story, but I will save that for another day.
Until then, let the formative experiences roll.
Leslie
If “lost, Found and Forever” sounds interesting to you,
just click on Big Boy below and you will be directed to
Amazons pre-order page.
_______________________________
“laissez le bon temps rouler”
— French Cajun saying
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