I know there are forces working in my life that I don’t understand. I accept many explanations for the magical moments when planets align and something happens that is unexpected or which exceeds expectations. I often attribute this helping hand to God or to the universe. I now include the helping hands of my mother and all my friends and family who have passed. I visualize that they are cheering me on my way in the world.

I have discovered the power of prayer, visualization, and meditation. I believe in synchronicity.

I accept the research that our brains are powerful; and that we fail to understand their enormous capability; and that we use only a small percentage of the brain’s potential. I understand that we transmit emotions and intentions on the molecular level. I am simultaneously a faith- and a science-person. I even studied luck and optimism to understand their impact on my life. All of this helps me keep my head on straight.

I know that positive thinking, reflection, planning, and follow-through work for me. I try to implement those practices every day and surround myself with activities that reinforce those habits.

Having recognized that these beliefs and behaviors form the core of my being, it is no surprise that I find myself thinking that the universe is currently sending me many messages, all with the same theme. It seems that the positive powers in our world want me to embrace the lessons being offered. And I am listening.

This past week, I embarked on several days of business travel, choosing to drive more than 1,000 miles through three states. I used my time to catch up on phone calls, pay attention to the news, and listen to an audio book. I chose the newly released Dare to Lead by Brene Brown. I have been following Brene’s work for many years. People whom I admire have also recommended her writing to me. She is a researcher, writer, speaker, and consultant in brain science, behavioral health, and complex emotional stuff that most people avoid. The joy of being alone, in the capsule of my car, with her voice passionately sharing her thoughts and observations was food for my soul. Her book is so packed with discovery that I had to stop often to write out a passage or just be quiet to let the words settle in my heart and mind.

During the last leg of my drive, one of her chapters started with this statement from AA teachings, “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” Wow! It is only in the past few months that I have been able to reframe my life’s experience and explain my family dynamic as a secret. It has been in the illumination of this secret that I have come to understand the unspoken rules, patterns of behavior, and assigned roles that made up the culture of my family. And that all of those things had their roots firmly embedded in a secret.

Our family secret was too painful to discuss, too linked to emotions and experiences to unleash, and too big for any one person to carry. To bring it out of the darkness into the light was too scary, and no one in my family had the confidence or experience to try. Social norms of the times did not encourage or support the vulnerable exploration of such a secret. It is only now, when I am just weeks away from a milestone birthday of sixty, with much of my life in the rearview mirror, that I have pieced it all together and made peace with the history.

When Brene Brown’s voice spoke to me from the audio book quoting an Alcoholics Anonymous saying, “You’re only as sick as your secrets,” I nearly drove off the road and shouted ‘Amen!’

I think the road signs of my life, and the energies from which they come, are pointing in the same direction. And I want to say back, ‘Thank you. I am listening!’

Here are a few questions
about Signs and Secrets:

• Are there unexplored secrets in your life?
• Are you keeping some secret from yourself, your loved ones or in your work life, which would release some pain if you risked bringing that secret responsibly into the light?
• Are these questions too big? Too deep? Do they make you feel too vulnerable?
• What relevance does exploring your inner landscape have on your work life?
• What are the road signs of your life telling you?
• Or, Leslie, cut it out — all this deep thinking stuff.

Leslie