“Dwelling on the past only blinds you to the future.
Missing home is natural,
but embrace the present and create a new place
that feels just as comforting.”

— Dale Carnegie

I have just returned from five days committed to being in a different environment with different responsibilities, new people, and new experiences.

I joined a group of adult learners for five days in the emersion of nature, horses, dogs, human guides, and the opportunity to explore and tune into my inner self.

As we circled up on the first day to make light introductions the question we responded to was, “Where is home?”

Each of us introduced ourselves and the geographic place we reside and then we — each of us — started to explore the deeper concept of “Where is home?” This can be a little question or a very large question. And very subtly, it started us on the journey into our minds, then to the feeling in our chests, and finally deep into our hearts.

So, this morning in the dark of a fall day, sitting with coffee at my dining room table, I ask you the question, “Where is home?”

I didn’t plan on starting my day writing or sharing. It was while I walked through a house —  that I have yet to live in full time but took up residence during this week — that as I visited each room and readied the house for the arrival of my five dogs (who have yet to live here full time, either) that this very big question floated through my head, then chest, and filled my heart.

I think that I am home. At least, in a physical space that I am ready to claim. I feel calm, settled, and well-slept. I enjoyed touring each room with a sense of contentment as I started my morning routine. The space is different — there are stairs and new sounds. And new routines to explore. I feel both settled and energized at the same time. Is that a feeling of home or home base?

I have found this sense of home in many places. When I find it on a trip, I carry home some piece of the culture or place to incorporate into my home base. I have found work homes and places that I feel entirely in my skin. I have found homes in the comfort of family and friends. I can make a home anywhere for myself like a small animal in a small borough wiggling into the space with my stuff and making it a home for my work time, quiet time, adventure time, and living.

In whatever space I am given, I can create a place to work (and play?). Is this a home?

• Does this sharing of my experience raise any thoughts in your head or heart?

I will hold this question for the rest of the day. As I start to shift to the responsibilities of the day and out of my reflection, another memory bubbles up: there have been many times in my life when I was searching for a home. It wasn’t the person I was with or the geographical location, but rather a feeling that I was yearning to find. Over the years, I have found myself in beautiful places with good people and yet, very much not at home nor feeling safe and settled.

It wasn’t until my forties that I found myself one morning realizing that I was in the right place, at the right time, engaging in the right things. It was a great realization. I didn’t need to continue to search to create this space.

• Have you ever had that feeling?

Yet, I have a feeling that I will continue to move in and out of times when I feel grounded and anchored in a home and times when I am in transition between where I’ve been and where I am going.

I think I am emerging from a stretch of limbo — between the shores, not yet arrived at where I am supposed to be.

Thanks to the week at the ranch being facilitated into being in my body and grounded and attuned in silence, stillness, slow motion, sighing, and smiling I am wrestling less with the limbo transition time and willing to let go of ‘making something happen.’ In letting go, I think I have arrived and discovered myself exactly where I am supposed to be now. The rest will sort itself out.

This may be the question I ask you when we next meet:

 • Are you home?

Leslie

P.S. If you are curious about the experience of being on seventy acres learning with four-footed friends and human guides, go to www.spirit-of-leadership.com

 _______________

“Accept the things to which fate binds you,
and love the people with whom fate brings you together,
but do so with all your heart.”

— Marcus Aurelius

“I long, as does every human being,
to be at home wherever I find myself.” 

— Maya Angelou